Targets

  • Talk less
  • Watch myself more closely
  • Identify the games I initiate and get drawn into
  • Lay pathway with 3’x2’ slabs
  • Bring fridge downstairs
  • Phone Sony engineer
  • Talk to Dev about my agenda items

What I did accomplish and why? (Achievements, Node, Contribution.)

Because I have talked less I have been more focused. With the Sony engineer, I did not take ‘no’ for an answer and eventually got put through to the right man with whom I had a good chat and who was very helpful. I do have a way with people when I put my mind to it.

Talking less means that I am less emotional and so I was able to communicate my issue with the July bills and lack of resources to Karaj quickly and concisely such that Karaj did not get flustered. This is something he has talked to me about in the past: that I make him nervous because of my emotions.

With the garden work in the afternoon I struggled to get going, both physically and mentally. Because of my goal to watch myself more closely I noticed that this state was reinforcing itself, causing me to become more and more withdrawn. So, during the tea break after we had begun to fix the length of angle iron onto the messy-looking panels, I verbalised where I was. Not only that, but I checked with Dev and Simran to see where they were. I didn’t need to ask Karaj because he had told me straight away that he was feeling low too. The very act of verbalisation was enough to halt and, to an extent, reverse the withdrawal process – a fact that I would observe throughout the weekend.

When we got back to work fixing the angle iron firmly onto the panels, we brought the job back up to our usual standards and I began to come alive. The combination of awareness, verbalisation and standards was all it took. For the rest of the day, evening and night I worked well, mainly with Dev moving slabs while Karaj and Simran laid the path. I took this opportunity to talk to Dev about my agenda items for the weekend. By 23.00 we had completed an excellent day’s work and the path not only looked great, it was a pleasure to walk on as well.

As I was carrying my last slab. Robert asked me facetiously whether I had carried it all by myself. I said nothing and simply made a note of what he said so that I could challenge him later. He had made a similar remark about the tennis ball I had put ton the end of the angle iron to safeguard against anyone cutting themselves.

What I did not achieve and why?

I was not aware of the games I played and got drawn into. I find this difficult to do but feel sure that in my quietness I will begin to see them.

Learning points

  • I achieve what I focus on
  • In my quietness there is a tendency to withdraw
  • I can halt my withdrawal by engaging with my environment – verbally or physically

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