I Have Worked Wonders

Friday 10 January, 2003

Yesterday, after only two hours sleep, I prepared breakfast and pastimed with the temple dwellers on their return (Karaj, Dev and Priya). Then, while they slept, I worked on, continuing with the latest set of accounts. In the supervision session there was an for issue for Dev, which was relevant to me: I lose myself (disappear into myself) when I try to impress people, rather than just being me and doing what I do regardless of what others may or may not think. I also wondered, as Priya brought up the issue of her house list, why Karaj is taking on more work. It’s all to do with serving, I suppose.

This morning I felt tired, weak, and had a slight headache. Karaj had told me that, after working all night, it would not be the day after that would be difficult, but the second day. Today. In the supervision, Simran challenged Karaj on not including people in the WSG on Tuesday. I verbalised my need for sleep and that’s just what happened: after the session I rested for two hours. Easy.

Later in the afternoon I was beginning to go low, and spoke to Simran about it. He told me to cut it out. We talked about taking one step at a time. It helped me to stop the spiral down and I came back up again as a result. Karaj joined us and, whilst addressing Simran about me, he said, ‘I know I get annoyed with the bloke, but he has worked wonders’.

In the evening I worked with Simran to set down a procedure for inputting the agenda items and minutes for the Wednesday Supervision Group. And I challenged Dev on still having the labels on the bottom of his new shoes. I see this more often than should be allowed. How the fuck does it happen? The three of us were called in to Karaj’s session with Michelle and Serena. It was about the invisible Parent; a powerful discussion on how we carry the group with us wherever we are. Also, Serena fed back that it was good to see us challenging each other (I was the main one doing the challenging). I have not heard this since Sicily. Don’t get cocky.

Summary: verbalised and got what I needed this morning. Simran picked me up in the afternoon and that was all I needed to remain active for the rest of the day.


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