Write A Different Story

Friday 21 March, 2014

Whilst editing this whole blog into three volumes, I became tired of reading about my negativity in the mornings. I also grew weary of the repetitive nature of the discoveries I was making. It seemed as though I was forgetting everything that had gone before, reinventing the wheel every day and excitedly recording my findings, but not actually doing anything with them.

Reading again and again what I wrote over the years, I was struck by the self-indulgence of my work, when the actual purpose of the material is to highlight the essence and beauty (and hard work) of the personal development process. I recall Karaj saying to a number of the other group members during my final year: ‘I don’t have to read Jonathan’s self-appraisals any more because he is writing the same things he was writing two years ago.‘ I felt chastised and embarrassed by his words but, once again, in time I have seen for myself what he was saying.

The purpose of this post, therefore, is to redress the balance with a fictitious account of an ideal day and, in doing so, make it a reality:

Woke up with the alarm and shifted gently, checking and connecting with my entire body. All good. One final stretch, three deep breaths and I’m up. No need to snooze these days; every day holds too much promise to lie around dozing (unless she is next to me, of course). Within minutes I’m out the door and on my morning walk in the park.

I greet the dog walkers and joggers as we pass each other, united in our appreciation of the day and the discipline of our early-morning activities. I speak to people more easily these days, engaging them in a way which belies my introverted nature.

Back home and another day of exercises and meditation means I continue my unbroken series. How many days is it now? Who cares? It’s all about my health and well-being. That has been my wish for years and I have it now. Furthermore, I appreciate it because I have worked for it. It is built on the same solid foundations as my personal development work, which continues to go from strength to strength, especially since I made the decision to smile more often.

It was the simplest of resolutions, but surprisingly difficult to implement because I kept forgetting to do it. Amazing, really, that such an effortless and rewarding muscle movement can slip our minds so easily. These days it comes more naturally to me. Practise makes perfect. After a bike ride in the dunes, I am ready for work.

My day is taken up with clients, emails, more writing and time spent with friends; all interspersed with enough quiet time for me to find peace and replenish my energy levels. As the day draws to a close, I am lucky enough to enjoy its final minutes with the one person who makes me laugh more than anyone else. She makes me love more than anyone else too, and as the clock ticks past midnight the only sound that can be heard through the open window is giggling. Hers and mine.

The aim now is to make it real. Every day. Much of it is already in place, although, admittedly, it’s possible I am asking too much, because there is one element I have to surrender. Be that as it may, she will always be a part of my story.


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