Guide

Here is some information to help you get the best out of this blog.

Posts

There are two sets of posts. One set of current posts, written specifically on the subject of personal development, and one set of journal entries specific to my own personal development from 11 years ago. The most recent posts are listed under the heading ‘Current Posts‘ in the right-hand menu. The complete list can be found in the Archives from 2011 onwards.

The journal posts can also be found in the Archives between the years 2001-2003. The most recent are listed in the right-hand menu under the heading ‘11 Years Ago‘. They are posted in real time on a near-daily basis. Each entry is always from 11 years ago which means the final journal entry will be posted on 24th October 2014. (There is more information on the About page.)

Random Post

Click on the link ‘Read a random blogpost’ on the right-hand side of the horizontal menu to generate a random post from all the current posts and journal entries.

Transactional Analysis

I was trained using Transactional Analysis (TA). There are a number of different areas within TA, all of which are raised again and again in my journals. The main topics are listed below. Each topic has its own category in the archives. There is also has a general category, Transactional Analysis, which provides a summary of the main TA posts.

Ten To Begin With

Here are ten posts which give an excellent introduction to the blog. I have included the final paragraphs of the respective posts to give you an idea of what you will find there. Click on the title to read the full post.

Make Yourself (Happy)

Reflect on who you are. You will find beauty. And you will undoubtedly find something to work on, which may leave you feeling downhearted. If it does, know that, irrespective of the outcome, the mere act of working on yourself can make you happy.

Think Whatever You Want

Next time you notice your mind telling you things about yourself which are not supportive, helpful or encouraging, redirect it onto something very simple such as counting each time you breathe out. In time you’ll be introducing it to more involved and more favourable thoughts. And before you know it you’ll find that you can think whatever you want.

Internal Dialogues

The woman mentioned in the second paragraph once listed, as one of her qualities, the fact that she is able to get on and do the things she doesn’t want to do. That’s because she has a strong Parent ego state. It had been provided by her parents during her upbringing, but we are also able to provide and shape our own. As with everything to do with personal development, it just takes awareness and practice: become conscious of the messages you are giving to yourself, maintain the positive ones and change the negative ones. And tell yourself to keep doing it.

Better Strategies

Life is about defining what we want and looking for the best strategies to help us realise our goals. As we search, however, we must be humble enough to question our existing strategies, re-examining them as we go. But we need not search alone. We are fortunate enough to be surrounded by people who can offer us the benefit of their wisdom. Their presence in our lives is invaluable. They may not be easy to spot, but they are inclined to say ‘thank you’ when you compliment them.

Life In The Middle

In his TED talk on The Surprising Science of Happiness, the Harvard psychology professor, Dan Gilbert, closes with the line: ‘We have within us the capacity to manufacture the very commodity we are chasing when we choose experience.‘ It means that, from the peaceful, tranquil place at the heart of everything, we can choose to feel whatever we want. Then, just like the tennis player, we return to the middle, safe in the knowledge that we will be restored to the calm, centred beings we were born to be.

Listen to Yourself

Research does tell us to exercise some caution with our intuition. There are times when blind faith in our intuitive responses will definitely lead us astray. However, the more we listen to ourselves and the more we observe, the better we become at discerning when to be confident and when to double check; when to have the courage to speak and when to hold back. It takes practice and awareness. And it starts by listening closely to your self.

Write Stuff Down

This all leads inevitably to an increase in awareness. You begin to notice more of everything. You observe how you act and react, and how situations play out differently if you alter just one aspect of who you are. The more you observe, the more likely you are actively to influence your own behaviour. But it doesn’t stop there because, fascinatingly, change also occurs without you even trying. The act of observation itself is enough to cause a shift. And you can set it all in motion by just putting pen to paper.

Make It All About You

There are people who wait for inspiration, thinking that’s how inspiration works. But those who know, understand that you have to work for it, chase it down, force it into existence. So, bend the universe to serve your purpose and reshape your world according to your vision. Make your goal the focus of everything you do. Talk to people about it and be on the lookout for ways to fulfill it. Then, at the end of the day, reflect on how much of your goal has been achieved and how it all happened. You may be surprised.

The Reality of Worry

The reality of worry is that there is always something we can do to help ourselves. This list provides ways do that, but perhaps the simplest way to resolve our worries is just to choose a different reality.

It’s the Future

The more people who take the time to examine their behaviour and work on themselves, the better it is for our species. It’s the future because when we look at ourselves we see what is wrong with our nature but we also see what is right. And, importantly, we discover that we have our evolution in our own hands.