Others’ Opinions

Thursday 4 May, 2000

How much easier my life would be if I could live with people’s opinion that I am a fool. This follows a conversation with Karaj during which he expressed, not for the first time, his satisfaction that some people consider him to be an incompetent fool.

One of my main stumbling blocks in life is my preoccupation with what other people think of me. I realise how unnecessary it is and how much of a hindrance it can be, but I continue to place more importance on what other people think than what I think. I cannot imagine how liberating it must be not to care what others think.

Why should I care or need to know what others think of me? They are usually in no position to give me feedback on my progress. They don’t know who I am, what I’m doing, where I started from or indeed where I want to go. Moreover, searching for confirmation outside of myself detracts from the real source of feedback. All I need is inside. If there are things about myself which make me unhappy then I can change them. If there are things about myself which make me happy then I build on them.

Am I satisfied with who I am? This is the only question I need to ask. Having said all that, if I can receive a progress report from someone who knows who I am, what I’m doing, where I started from and where I want to go, then my journey is made a whole lot easier and more enjoyable. Karaj has helped me enormously in this respect. The tools he has given me to work with are simply fantastic. His advice, support and encouragement are uplifting and motivating. He has been the driving force behind my progress of the last few months.

I do feel I will reach a point in my life where I am untouched by the views of others and content for some people to think I am an idiot, because then I can get on with my life, undisturbed by them and what they might think of me.

‘You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.’ — Eleanor Roosevelt

Related post: Contradiction, Paradox & Friendship

3 Responses to “Others’ Opinions”

  1. Eveline Says:

    Like Marian Keyes wrote: “don’t worry about what other people think of you. They are not thinking about you. They are thinking about themselves. Just like you.”

  2. George Says:

    It is amazing how much time and energy we expend worrying about what people think of us. They have their own concerns, and we hardly feature, if at all, on their radar. However, minds are powerful tools and it is difficult to convince ourselves otherwise.

  3. Jonathan Lewis Says:

    That’s so true, George.

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