Consider My Own Journey

Friday 29 December, 2000

Today I am getting back to my life. Karaj has further transformed my work area with added shelves, a lamp, and a stereo. It’s wonderful. Today has been a good day but as I finished typing up my time in Prague, all the feelings from yesterday return and once again I cannot stop myself from missing my brother.

After the short, open-hearted conversation we had in the summer I was hoping to experience further progress in our relationship. The fact that my expectations were not met does not mean that progress was not made. Karaj said that it’s not possible to maintain such a level of openness as was evident in the summer. Things had to slow down. I understand that. What’s important to remember is that he is doing really well and he will get where he wants to be. What I need to do is to consider myself and my journey.

I phoned Kuldip to see how he is doing. He seems very much to have benefited from the time away from the group. At first it scared him and for two months he made mistake after mistake, but now his attitude is much calmer. So much so that he will only return to the group when he is ready. I felt that this showed a greater maturity and a recognition of his own growth and potential for growth. He suggested that the three of us (Kuldip, Karaj and I) go for a meal.

Karaj was delighted to hear that Kuldip is doing well.


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