How We Contribute to Each Other

Thursday 22 November, 2001

Woke up feeling positive and exercised well. I am still not particularly well motivated and I still have thoughts about when I will be able to walk properly. These feelings are Child Ego State and I need to do something Parental to get myself out of what I am doing to myself. Kuldip arrived and got straight down to his earth digging. Soon afterwards George arrived and before long the four of us were out in the garden erecting new flower beds. It was a job which had been holding up the shifting of further buckets and we all worked well. While the others moved plants from one site to another, I drilled and filed the brackets for the bed surrounds. This activity was all the Parenting I needed to motivate myself.

Before lunch I made a flowing start on my reply to Francis’s letter. I noticed the difference between yesterday and today. I had tried to write it yesterday but got nowhere, whereas today, after waking myself up with one physical task, I was able to write easily. If I’m low, demotivated or pissed off then I need to move my arse.

At lunch I enjoyed a pleasant conversation with George about the Christmas market coming to town. I realised during our exchange just how much we have in common. For the remainder of the afternoon the two of us worked together in an uncomplicated and enjoyable fashion. Karaj later said that George had been a parental figure for me and my peer. More than my father has been. In the feedback session afterwards, during which Harriet was present, I read Francis’s letter. Karaj said Francis had been arrogant in going back to work prematurely (a message for George), but was satisfied with his analysis of his job situation – deciding that he didn’t need to move on and was happy to stay where he was and work (a message for Harriet).

At home I spoke to Dev and to Ishwar. I reminded Dev to bring his House of Lords case tomorrow and we both reminded each other not to get cocky. I informed Ishwar of the gathering at Sunil’s flat on Saturday to finish the painting. He said he would be there at some stage.


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