Appropriate Playing & Parenting

Wednesday 5 December, 2001

After a busy morning I spent a relaxing afternoon looking into the accounts for 2000-01. These have to be completed before the 15th January 2002. It seems that most of the paperwork is available. In the evening I started to bash myself up for not having done much work this afternoon. I realised the distinction between the Parent and Child ego states. My Child had basically been playing all day, and the only role available to my Parent was that of disciplinarian.

My Parent had not been given any opportunity to employ any of its other abilities. I had not exercised this evening, I had not worked this afternoon, I had not taken control or done any of the things which have helped me to distinguish my Parent from my Child during the last couple of weeks. As a result it registered itself in the only way it could: admonishing my Child for being lazy, irresponsible and lacking discipline.

The important insight for me here is the harmony which can be established by appropriate playing and parenting. Allowing my Parent the time and space to do the things it does best, releases my Child to play appropriately. It is better for them to work together instead of arguing with each other.


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