Skills, Influence & Maturity

Tuesday 11 December, 2001

Calvin came today and helped out with the conservatory. I did not do enough to welcome him into the working environment of the garden. I should have taken more control and filled him in fully about the work which has been done and still needs doing as well as the way we work. I did not instil enthusiasm in Calvin and as a result he was nervous and took time to get going.

With Kuldip and Calvin I realised how effective my presence and my skills are. In the morning I supervised Karaj and Kuldip as they moved nine of the huge fence panels into place for painting. I contributed to them both with directions and encouragement as they manoeuvred the panels into position, and I provided vital support to Karaj as he dealt, once again, with Kuldip’s ineptitude.

Kuldip demonstrated afresh how he wastes energy – he overdid it while trying to stabilise or lift each panel and infuriated Karaj in the process. He does not seem to understand how precious his energy is or how it could be more effectively utilised to sort himself out. This all helps me to put my abilities in perspective. Contrary to what I tell myself, it is not the case that everybody can do what I do.

In the middle of my work on the conservatory – we were fitting a curved piece of wood into the door frame – I became annoyed at myself and my situation because of the aches and pains in my body. Rather than persevere and ruin everything, I took time out and lay down. I was grateful for Karaj’s positive feedback for this move as it confirmed the maturity of my decision.


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