Blocked or Lazy?

Wednesday 20 March, 2002

07.20 E&M 40 mins. I woke up with a stiff back; the stiffness has moved from the right side of my lower back/hip to the base of my spine. I also had a headache and a run-down feeling. There should be no real reason for feeling run down.

Karaj suggested I have gone low because I am concerned that we will not make it through this difficult patch. Whilst I am not conscious that this is the case, I do wonder whether our lack of office work – due to the long weekend work and the general reluctance we both seem to have – will ever change. This is not really a concern; more of a curiosity because whatever happens I will always learn something about myself and about life, so I cannot lose.

Karaj said that, for whatever reason, we are blocked. I wondered whether it has more to do with being lazy. He has told me in the past that I am lazy, but he was adamant today that we are being blocked and that all we can do is to keep on going, and stay calm. We washed the work clothes and tidied Karaj’s office in the morning and spent the rest of the day trying to stay awake.


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