Don’t Change Your Own Procedures

Wednesday 2 October, 2002

I woke up at 07:30 and Karaj was already working. I offered my assistance and Karaj made an important point: ‘Get on with your exercises and I’ll see you at 8 o’clock. Don’t ever change you own procedures.’

Took an unexpected call from Francis this evening. He was ‘filling in the gap‘ between his last letter and my lack of reply. I told him that nothing has gone wrong and that our friendship is solid. His thoughts are that the distance between us has finally taken it’s toll and his hope is that one day we can be close to each other and do the things together that we want to.

Later, I spoke to Karaj. He told me I need to confront Ishwar, George and Simran for failing to turn up tonight. I took this personally. Why? I am working hard and Karaj acknowledged that, so why take it personally? Come from the place of ‘I am right’. Try it.

I phoned each of them in turn to confront them. I did it in a gentle rather than an aggressive way. Still, I got a feel for the principle of hard work and commitment which will lead to more forceful confrontations in the future. I am seeing that we are better off confronting and challenging each other rather than massaging each other’s egos. Saw how each one of them listened to me and agreed that it would have been worthwhile getting together. Did you hear that, Jonathan? They listened.

Summary: worked well and rested well. With the confrontations to Ishwar, George, and Simran I saw more of what I have created here and how there is no point being here unless we work. Also saw that I am working hard and seeing what hard work brings me and the possibilities of achievement it brings. Have looked after myself well today too, as I seem to do when I have some time & space to myself.


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