The List

Wednesday 16 August, 2017

What follows is a list of many of the most important pieces from this blog. The list makes it easy for you to understand at a glance what is necessary in this work. It takes you through the process of self-development and self-realisation – from awareness, observation and reflection, and back to awareness – offering you guidance on what to expect along the way and what you can do to help yourself.

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The seminar was about the power of thought and how, by creating clarity for ourselves in everything we do, we can improve our lives in a very simple way. It was the best seminar so far. It was also the one with the lowest attendance, which not only highlighted one of the main points of the session – that thoughts influence feelings – it also offered an example of an important aspect of personal development: non-attachment. But more of that later. Here is a brief summary of the seminar’s contents, with links to the relevant blog entries. (The corresponding page numbers of the book are in brackets.)

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Why We Need Boundaries

Friday 17 January, 2014

Establishing boundaries is a vital part of life. On the surface it looks to be more restrictive than liberating, but therein lies the paradox. Only when you set the boundaries do you have clarity about what is permitted and what is not. In sport, it is the rules and regulations which shape the game. In business we draft contracts which provide a precise framework for collaboration. Without rules every contest would quickly descend into chaos; a free-for-all with everyone doing whatever they wanted. Interestingly, one of the causes of the latest financial crisis was the deregulation of the institutions.

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Be Humble

Friday 27 June, 2003

Simran was challenged in the lunchtime session. He had cornered Calvin and Shona by dumping his agenda items on them in the feedback session. He has nothing to say. No responsibility. He does not want to sort his life out. Later, when he made a mistake with the tape recorder, I challenged him fully and informed him I don’t want him here on Fridays anymore. I told Karaj what I had said, then went upstairs for a rest. I slept soundly, but felt disappointment on waking when I realised Simran was still downstairs.

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A Problem Shared

Saturday 19 May, 2001

The men’s group started with a look at the games we have been playing. I concentrated on my exchange with Aubrey from yesterday morning. Talking about it, initially with Sunil and then with the group, allowed my worries to resurface about the fact that I had not been straight with Aubrey. These were to stay with me for most of the day as I remained subdued and quiet.

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Consistency, Boundaries & Discipline

Friday 1 December, 2000

After a late night I had another lie-in. Two in two days. I felt a little tired and under the weather this morning. I spoke to Karaj and he said that it may well mean that I am doing well and that something is about to happen. I should, therefore, be very aware this weekend, especially as I have a full programme. Tonight I am going for a few drinks with Aubrey and Tom, and tomorrow I am going to visit Alex.

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Be the Boundaries

Monday 3 April, 2000

I visited Maxine at the weekend and it seemed that, without talking it through, we both knew the boundaries. Karaj assures me that it was because I knew the boundaries. I must not assume that she was also aware of them.

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