Journeys Within Journeys

Thursday 2 October, 2014

In the days before I set off to spend a month in the sunshine, there was reluctance. I had booked the trip primarily out of need, rather than desire. Desire alone would not have sufficed to make it happen, because I have come to value routine over adventure; repetition over novelty. These past weeks have re-awakened the adventurous side of my character in the most gentle way possible: within the secure friendship of good people, and in a beautiful, warm part of the world where everything was in place for me to create my normal routine, meet new people, indulge ever more effortlessly in new experiences, and see myself in sharper focus.

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It’s Your Playground

Sunday 29 June, 2014

Whenever the last people left on Sunday nights, my first reaction was always relief because I could finally have some time and space to myself. But there was envy too. I envied them for the lives they all had outside the house, away from the furnace of self-development we had created for ourselves. They were able to leave the analysis and self-reflection for a few days, allow the wounds of the weekend to heal, and get on with their respective lives. For me it was different. When I locked the door behind them, I knew there was no other place for me to go. I had cornered myself into an existence devoted almost exclusively to personal development.

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The People We Meet

Sunday 8 June, 2014

They say true wealth is measured not by money, but by how much time we have to do whatever we like. Similarly, we can measure how congruent we are by the people in our lives and the people we meet. This post is a comment on the fact that the people we meet are a reflection of ourselves. They are signposts informing us where we are in life; and our connection with them helps to shed light on whether we should continue on our particular path or make changes. In addressing this, I make a distinction between two environments: one which served me well but was not my goal; and one which brings more harmony.

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Note To Self: Accept Invitations

Monday 24 March, 2014

As an introvert, my default position when I receive an invitation is almost always: No thanks. (Notable exceptions include weddings, some birthdays and close friends.) I am aware of my reluctance, which means it is less likely to influence me. I also understand that too much of anything can be harmful (in this case, isolation) and my experience tells me that social situations can actually be fun, so I tend to accept invites more easily these days. But not automatically.

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It All Comes Down To This

Monday 14 October, 2013

When we forget the simplicity of it all, or we’re convinced there must be another way; when we are stuck, or frustrated by the lack of novelty, this is the post to read. It’s a reminder of the value of repetition and practise. Every day, every minute, every breath. In the end, it all comes down to this:

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Nourishing Connections

Wednesday 12 June, 2013

I went to London last week and for the entire time I was there I connected. I connected with people who are very close to me; with people I hadn’t seen for years; and even one person I hadn’t seen for decades. I connected with people I’d never seen before and people I’ll undoubtedly never see again. This post is about the appreciation of those connections. Appreciation in both senses: of gratitude and of becoming more valuable over time. They left me feeling as though they had nourished my soul.

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An Altered Landscape

Thursday 11 April, 2013

Whilst writing the previous post, ‘It Works. Beautifully.’, I realised that, not only was the experience described there the most positive I have ever had, it has also bestowed on me a feeling that my landscape has been altered. The beauty she and I created permeates my existence and, consequently, I now inhabit a more serene place. Because of her. Because of us.

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Supporting Each Other

Friday 11 May, 2012

This post is inspired by an entry from my training journal in which I was challenged to provide support to another member of the group. The entry itself doesn’t appear in this blog although I did comment on it in another post, ‘Be Firm With People & Contribute’. The following paragraph is an extract from the unpublished entry:

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Make A Connection

Monday 24 October, 2011

There are a few phrases I remember very well from my training because I heard them so often. One of them was a challenge that could be heard in the silences which sometimes followed people’s contributions to the group: ‘Make a connection, people. Make a connection.’ Each time he said it, Karaj was asking us to connect with each other. Nothing else. Just connect. He always urged us to look for the humanity in people and this was allied to that.

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Contradiction, Paradox & Friendship

Wednesday 4 May, 2011

The writings in this blog may sometimes seem to contradict themselves. Where that happens, it is worth examining the contradiction more closely because we either discover there is no contradiction at all or, in its place, we find a paradox. This post is an example of what I mean. Whilst editing the entry from 11 years ago (‘Others’ Opinions’), I was reminded of a friend of mine and a story which needs to be told in order to give a fuller perspective on what is written in that entry.

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Experiencing Yourself

Tuesday 26 April, 2011

There are a few recent journal entries from 11 years ago missing. I have left them out because they are just me going round in circles following the ending of my relationship from that time (see the entry, ‘Listen to Myself’). I ended up writing her a letter telling her what I thought of her. But I never sent it. I wanted to because I felt she needed to know what I had written. But Kuldip, who arrived just as I had finished writing it, told me not to. There was no need. I remember Karaj’s words from the post, ‘Love & Compassion’‘If I have to criticise, I walk away.’

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Men & Women

Thursday 31 March, 2011

We’re different. And the day we realise this, our lives and our worlds become better and easier places to inhabit. When I began my training in 2000 I was invited to join the men’s group run by Karaj, my trainer. I had been a very keen footballer and many of my greatest moments in life had been as part of successful teams together with other men, working with and for each other.

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I Need To Win

Monday 6 October, 2003

After breakfast, I looked at my Vivekananda books: ‘We are responsible for who we are, because we have the power to be whoever we wish.’ Karaj and I then sat in the sunken garden for hours and talked. We began with how he prepares so thoroughly for every eventuality because it lessens the chance of the script finding a way through. If we are not prepared when we walk into a room, then we will always attract those people who will perpetuate our script. I felt emotional about how I have behaved towards people of late. I do not want to be an emotional person who takes it out on others.

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What’s With This Anger?

Saturday 4 October, 2003

I woke up and got ready for my walk: groin okay, back not bad, mind subdued. As I walked, only one thought came to me: What is the difference between being with my anger fully and holding on to it? And if I am with it fully will it drag me down?

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